Untitled Draft

November 30, 2011

Today’s a holiday —- Bonifacio’s Day to be exact. And it feels weird because it’s not a long weekend. I guess my mind been accustomed that whenever there’s a holiday, there’s going to be a long weekend (read: holiday economics). And to think just yesterday, I just came home from 4-day out of town vacation….. hehehehe…. Yup, been having itchy feet lately.  Don’t know why. Though promised myself I’m gonna stay put in the greater Manila area the whole month of December. That being said, I begged off being with my mom and relatives to a weeklong visit to the island of Mariin and Gatduke next week.

Sorry have to cut this short…. TBC….. or not…..

Surprise me not

November 20, 2011

Majority of the people I know love surprises. I don’t. Sorry for being a party pooper but I really don’t like it. I don’t like being blind sighted by something or someone. Maybe if I had an inkling or have thought of that possibility happening, it wouldn’t be that bad. But if that possibility didn’t even cross my mind, I would have a hard time coming to grips with it. Yes, whether good or bad. Nice surprises are great —- after the initial shock, that is. My mind has to first grasp the idea that it happened and come to terms with it then I would welcome it with open arms. Of course, I would have preferred that feelers were set-out prior to it happening.

Maybe my aversion to surprises comes from the fact that I don’t like change. I know —- the only thing constant in this world is change (such irony); for progress, change is inevitable. Yada, yada, yada…. I have already accepted those realities but it doesn’t mean I have to like them.

I don’t like my boat being rocked. I like things still and constant. It gives me a sense of security. It’s my comfort zone — my territory. When things don’t change, I know how things are, what will or can happen, who or what I can depend on. In short, I know how to deal. And when things change, even if it’s for the better, I have to adjust. Many new factors will be added to situation. I have to re-evaluate things, people and scenarios again. No, I’m not O.C though I think I have some “control” issues.

I admit, sometimes, I purposely bring about those changes into my life. But you can be assured I have already thought of the worst things that could happen. So if and when they do happen, I have no one to blame but myself and you can bet your bottom dollar I already have a back-up or escape plan. But most of the time, changes happen in my life because of outside forces I have no control over. And that’s where my biggest hurdle lies. I know the only thing I can do is to adapt, and I will. Just give me time.

Blessings Galore

November 1, 2011

Life is good  great.  When I think that it wouldn’t get any better than this (not because it can’t but because it would just be too much), it does.  Yes, it’s been raining (storm like) blessings once again —tangible and intangible.  I’d be a hypocrite if I say I don’t want it but I guess I’m just overwhelmed about it.  A lot more people I know deserve these more than me (read: mas mabait sila sakin) but God chose me instead. I don’t why but I’m uber thankful. I thought before that only one aspect of your life could be this wonderful and the rest would be so-so, if not drab. But time and again, I’ve been proven wrong. I’d be more than happy to be always way off mark on my pessimistic view on things.  =o)

Please don’t get me wrong — my life isn’t perfect, far from it. It’s not a bed of roses (hey, even those have thorns). I still have my issues, struggles and what-nots. But it’s just that everything is falling to its place. It’s hard to put into words; you have to be in my shoes to understand what I’m feeling right now. For the lack of a better term, I feel contented. Of course, I still have things to wish for and dreams to fulfil. I guess, I’m just happy with how things are right now. Not the giddy happy you want to jump up with joy and shout, though I think I did what when a certain windfall recently came my way…. hehehehe….. But right now, I’m happy in the sense that I have a sweet smile on my face,  a gratified disposition, and a extremely  thankful heart .