Functional Emotional Wreck

October 16, 2006

Grief strikes me at the most unexpected places. If I can mask it, I let the tears flow. But if it would put me in a very embarrassing situation, I do my damnest to stop them. I tell you, it is not an easy task. Sometimes, people would catch me numbly staring into space. I really have to get a grip. But to my credit, all my other faculties are fine. I can still work efficiently and make good judgment. In short, I am a functional emotional wreck. No, I'm not crazy — just broken. I can sometimes force myself to be happy but I miss effortlessly feeling the sense of joy (there's a difference). I guess it'll take time before things go back to normal.